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Sunday, August 14, 2016


Arriving on a silver platter From Arrow Video on July 16th, is the dangerously cheesy Microwave Massacre. Seriously, if you are lactose intolerant, you should watch this on a toilet. 

I remember seeing the original box art for Microwave Massacre as a kid in the local video store and thinking, "There is no fucking way I am going to watch this; It looks way too gross." If I knew then what I know now, I probably wouldn't have worried so much because, the box writes a check that the film just can't cash. I mean, you have a guy licking his lips and holding silverware, eagerly watching a decapitated head get gooey in a microwave. I bet it didn't taste so good. Ever tried to nuke McDonald's french fries? How'd that work out for ya?

Microwave Massacre plays out like a Z-grade Mel Brooks film with deadpan schtick and jokes that don't quite hit the mark. But that is also part of the charm. There was also some gratuitous T 'n' A, which is never a bad thing, and all the food puns were great, like May's (Claire Ginsberg) painful mispronunciations of the names of food and the cultures of which she was trying to emulate. The director, Wayne Berwick, aimed extremely high in trying to get Rodney Dangerfield for the lead, but that didn't happen. His buddies recommended Jackie Vernon, the voice of Frosty the Snowman, as well as a nightclub comedian that had appeared on The Tonight Show. He was Dangerfield-esque, so he still fit Berwick's vision for the character of Donald. Sharp-eyed viewers may recognize the bum that scratches his balls with the severed hand as Robert Burns, of Texas Chainsaw Massacre fame.

Arrow Video cooked up a great 2K transfer resulting in barely ANY film grain and little to no artifacts that I noticed. The negative must've been very well taken care of, which for a film like this, seems pretty rare. Usually, a film like Microwave Massacre would be stored in a dank basement or not even exist. If you by chance happened to have seen Arrow's recent release of Jack Hill's, The Swinging Cheerleaders, Hill himself admits that the print was not taken care of at all. Also, while there isn't a wealth of extras, the making-of featurette provides some fascinating insight on the making of the film.

Overall, Microwave Massacre is a well done release from Arrow Video, so get your bibs on and prepare to gorge yourself on some well-aged gorgonzola.

Order here.

From Arrow Video:
THEY CAME FOR DINNER...TO FIND THEY WERE IT!! Microwave Massacre stars legendary stand-up comedian and actor Jackie Vernon as Donald, a disgruntled construction worker whose wife's predilection for haute cuisine drives him to cannibalism. Donald unwittingly stumbles upon a solution to his two major problems in his life - his nagging wife and his lack of tasty meals - when, one night, he bludgeons his better half to death with a pepper grinder in a drunken rage. Thinking on his feet, Donald dismembers the body and sets about microwaving the remains, which turn out to be rather delicious. Trouble is, now he's got a taste for human flesh that needs satisfying... Eschewing all notions of good taste, Wayne Berwick's Microwave Massacre is a deliciously depraved exercise in political incorrectness that has gone on to gain a cult following thanks to a characteristically deadpan performance from lead Vernon, who delivers such choice lines as "I'm so hungry I could eat a whore". Vegetarians need not apply!
Bonus Materials:
  • Brand new 2K restoration of the original camera negative
  • High Definition Blu-ray (1080p) and Standard Definition DVD presentations
  • Original Mono audio (uncompressed PCM on the Blu-ray)
  • Optional English subtitles for the deaf and hard of hearing
  • Brand new audio commentary with writer-producer Craig Muckler moderated by Mike Tristano
  • Brand new making-of featurette including interviews with Muckler, director Wayne Berwick and actor Loren Schein
  • Reversible sleeve featuring original and newly commissioned artwork to be revealed
  • First pressing only: fully-illustrated collector’s booklet featuring new writing on the film by Nightmare USA author Stephen Thrower

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